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Script Excerpt:

 

INT. RED DRAGON ‘CHINIESE RESTOORANT’ - NIGHT

 

            Working-class men eat noodles in the grimy dining area. With its dirty floors,

            rickety benches, and multitudes of flies, only diplomats would call the

            Red Dragon a dive.  

 

The patrons stare as CHICKIE -- a pretty but disheveled 22 year old girl

approaches the counter. 2 perky ponytails and a tight little outfit mark her

as a Valley Girl very far from home. Jamal and Gaurav enter.

 

            Chickie counts the several coins she holds in her palm.

 

                                CHICKIE

(heavily English-accented Hindi)

         [Does the price include the tax?]

 

                                CHINESE COUNTER MAN

                      [What?]

 

                                 GAURAV

                          (nudging Jamal)

                      ... Macromastias...

 

             Jamal looks at Gaurav.

 

                                 GAURAV (CONT'D)

                      Big tits.

 

                                 CHICKIE

                      [Does the price include the tax?]

 

                                CHINESE COUNTER MAN

                          (switching to English)

                      No taxes.

 

                                 GAURAV

                          (chuckles)

                      Is that the most fucked up Hindi you ever

                      heard!?

 

                                JAMAL

                      No that honor belongs to you.

 

            Chickie glances back. Gaurav stops.

 

                                CHICKIE

                      How much is it with the tax?

 

                                CHINESE COUNTER MAN

                      What tax?

 

                                CHICKIE

                      I don't know what tax! Just Tax!

 

                                CHINESE COUNTER MAN

                      No, no, No tax, madam!

 

            She scans the badly misspelled items on the chalk board menu.

 

                                CHICKIE

                      I'll have the chicken 35 noodles.

 

                                CHINESE COUNTER MAN

                          (screams toward the kitchen)

                      One Chicken 35 Noodle!

 

            Chickie is a little taken aback with the shout. The counter man points

            at a table. She goes and sits there.

 

            A smiling Gaurav turns to Jamal.

 

                                GAURAV

                      She's clueless, dude.

 

            A waiter brings her the noodles and a plate with a spoon.

 

                                CHICKIE

                          (to the waiter)

                      Can I have some chopsticks?

 

                                WAITER

                      Kya sticks?

 

                                CHICKIE

                      [Can I have some chopsticks?]

 

            No response from the waiter.

 

                                CHICKIE (CONT'D)

                      Don't you have chopsticks? How am I

                      supposed to eat this? ... With my hands?

 

            The counter man hears this:

 

                                MAN AT COUNTER

                      No Chopsticks Madam!

 

            Chickie picks up the spoon:

 

            Gaurav laughs. Jamal smiles - they share the joke.

 

                                                                                                            CUT TO:

 

            EXT. BOMBAY STREETS / TRUCK - NIGHT

 

Badri talks while Laaloo -- a burly, potbellied man in dirty khakis --

pointedly adjusts the lemon string charms hanging off his truck’s bumper.

 

                                BADRI

                      [...so when we stop you stop. Is that

                      simple enough?]

 

             Laaloo adjusts another garland.

 

                                BADRI (CONT'D)

                      [What's your name?]

 

                                LAALOO

                      Laaloo...

 

            Laaloo looks at Badri - pleased he has a chance.

 

                                LAALOO

                      [My name was Dulia but I changed it to

                      honor Sri Laaloo Prasad Yadavji. Do you

                      know who he is?]

 

            Badri nods.

 

                                LAALOO (CONT'D)

                      [Laaloo is Bihar's greatest Chief

                      Minister. Laaloo is Bihar and Bihar is

                      Laaloo! You understand? --]

 

            Before he can continue a piercing SCREAM shatters the moment.

            Everyone on the street stops and looks at the dhaba. Badri investigates.

 

                                                                                                            CUT TO:

 

           INT. RED DRAGON ‘CHINIESE RESTOORANT’- NIGHT

 

            Chickie looks at the spoon. It's filthy. She starts to cry.

            Gaurav looks around, gets up and goes to her. Badri reaches

            her too. The patrons look - some whisper.

 

                                GAURAV

                      Are you OK?

 

            Chickie just sobs with her head on the table. She's pushed

            aside the plate and the noodles. The man at the counter

            approaches:

 

                                BADRI

                      What happened? .... What did you do to

                      her?

 

                                GAURAV

                      Nothing! I don't know!

 

                                CHINESE COUNTER MAN

                      What happened Madam?...

 

                                BADRI (CONT'D)

                      Who's she?

 

                                CHINESE COUNTER MAN

                      Noodles too hot?

 

                                GAURAV

                      I don't know

 

                                BADRI (CONT'D)

                      Why's she crying?

 

                                GAURAV

                      I don't know!!!!

 

                                CHINESE COUNTER MAN

                      Why she cry?

                          (to the waiter)

                      What did you do to her matherchod?

 

                                WAITER

                      I didn't do a thing!

 

            Chickie looks up slowly.

 

                                CHICKIE

                      The spoon is dirty!

 

            Chickie put's her head back on the table.

 

                                CHICKIE (CONT'D)

                      Everything is so fucked! I just want to

                      go home!

 

            More sobbing.

 

                                BADRI

                      Where's home?

 

                                CHICKIE

                      Liverpool!

 

                                GAURAV

                      Yo, that's where I'm from! ... Liverpool

                      representing.

 

                                BADRI

                      Shut up!

 

                                CHICKIE

                      He said he'd be back...I waited and

                      waited. They kicked me out of the hotel

                      ... I ran out of money.... 

 

            More sobbing.

 

                                BADRI

                      Who?

 

            She stops crying.

 

                                CHICKIE

                      Shankar... Shankar Kapoor! He borrowed

                      everything I had!

 

                                CHINESE COUNTER MAN

                      Oh, Film Producer?

 

                                CHICKIE

                      Yeah.

                          (perks up)

                      You know where to find him?

 

                                CHINESE COUNTER MAN

                      They all have offices at fillum city.

 

                                CHICKIE

                      Film City? ...

                          (quivers)

                      How am I going to get there with no

                      money?

 

            The patrons begin looking to Badri and Gaurav.

 

                                GAURAV

                          (loudly to Badri)

                      Badri aren't we driving by Film City?

 

                                CHINESE COUNTER MAN

                      Yes, yes... take her to Film City. I'll

                      make noodle parcel.

 

            Badri glares back at Gaurav.

 

                                CHINESE COUNTER MAN (CONT'D)

                          (to the waiter)

                      Chutiye, noodle parcel bana.

 

            Chickie springs up and looks into Badri's eyes:

 

                                CHICKIE

                      Can you take me? ... Please!

 

            Everybody in the restaurant looks to Badri.

 

                                                                 CUT TO: